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The one thing that will keep you from becoming fluent in a language

January 21, 2013 By Cher 62 Comments

The one thing that will keep you from becoming fluent in a language

Why are you here right now?
No, really?
Are you sure want to learn this language?
I’ll give you a few minutes to think about it.

Still here?
Alright, that means that you must be willing to put in the hours every day, every week, every month until you’re at the level that you want to be at, right?

The broken record wisdom of life keeps singing away that every goal that you want to accomplish requires hard work and practice on a consistent basis.

Record Player

[photo credit: edogisgod]

Being able to speak a language gets hit right in the center with this bullet.

If you’re going to stick around and hang out with me, then I expect you to put in the hours.

You’ll get bonus points if you trip over yourself with love for the language on your way there, too.

You get extra bonus points if you’re already in love with it & you feel gung-ho about starting this crazy adventure of diving into a culture.

So, it’s recommended that right now, out loud, you say to yourself (even if people are around you on the subway as you read this): “I’m deciding that I’m going to commit to learning _____, and I know that it will be hard, and I know that it will be a lot of work, but I’m going to do it.”

Affirmation it up.

Use the art of affirmations, of creating positive statements to improve your mindset and your life, to make a difference this goal around (because we all know that we’ve been a 78 goals before, and they just haven’t worked out).

Enough with the preaching.

Here’s the one thing that you should do right now, in this very moment, if you’re committed to becoming a speaker of this language.

Take out a sheet of paper and your most fluid writing pen, and write down your ‘why’ for learning this language.

I’ll wait for you to get your materials.

Got ‘em?

Sweet. Let’s go.

The lovely, inspirational concept of declaring your why comes from Simon Sinek’s infamous Ted talk that you can watch here if you so desire (It’s 18 minutes of pure ‘Oh’s’ and ‘Yes’s and ‘That makes so much sense’s).

Screen Shot 2013-05-02 at 11.23.30 PM

Although his talk is geared toward business, there is evident truth here that applies specifically to learning languages, and it’s free advice that will give you a strong foundation for any language software.

He argues, “People don’t buy what you do, they buy why you do it.”

Transforming that into something that’s relevant to language learning, I say to you,”You won’t change your life and your behavior to include this language unless you buy into why you’re doing it in the first place.”

And then he asks, “What’s your purpose? What’s your cause? What’s your belief?”

Really, why do you buy into learning this language?

To get you jump started, I’ll tell you mine.

Let me tell you why I’ve started this project: I believe that there are people all around the world craving connection to each other, across country lines and language barriers. I believe that people, when pushed in the right direction with the right amount of inspiration, will willingly jump into the icy waters, learn the language, and make friends in other worlds that will transform the way they think about life. I believe that people are stoked at the thought of getting out of their cushy, comfy lives to go shake up their foundations and have an adventure with their new language as a tool.

venice3Let me tell you why I’m learning to speak Italian: I believe in connection, and I love Italians. I think their language sounds like music. I love that they know exactly how to relax. I believe that by learning Italian, it will infuse my life with the passion that they feel towards art, music, and beauty. I love walking around Italy and being able to speak to the people about the things that matter the most to them in their own language. I love seeing their faces light up when they realize that I can have a conversation with them.

I have these written on sticky notes on my computer desktop.

And I do my best to read them everyday.

Now, it’s your turn.

In the comments below, with as much thought and love as you can put into them, write your why for starting this adventure into learning a language.

 

[photo credit:  Heather Sutta <3]

Filed Under: Italian Tagged With: Beginner Italian, intermediate italian, learning languages

About Cher

Cher is the founder of The Iceberg Project and a passionate learner of the Italian, Mandarin and Spanish languages. In a little town called Vegas, you can find her searching the Internet for Doctor Who and Parks & Rec memes, drinking bubble tea, or talking about how much she loves grammar.

11 Basic Expressions to Master in Italian »

Comments

  1. melissamuldoon says

    August 2, 2013 at 8:34 am

    Brava! Siamo in sintonia! Parole direttamente dal mio cuore.

    Reply
    • cherhale says

      August 20, 2013 at 9:40 pm

      :]

      Reply
  2. Marta Raaka says

    August 20, 2013 at 4:42 pm

    We’ve had some amazing encounters in Italy because I can have basic conversations. I can’t wait to get even more fluent.
    Sono d’accordo, la gente è molto simpatica!

    Reply
    • cherhale says

      August 20, 2013 at 9:41 pm

      Isn’t it the most amazing feeling? I think it’s one of the best ways to keep your motivation up too because you’re always remembering how it felt to be able to to speak to another person in a different language. If you ever have any questions, always feel free to email me!

      Reply
  3. Angela says

    October 31, 2013 at 9:52 am

    My main purpose in learning Italian is to converse with and share in my granddaughters lives. Now I have spent some time in Italy I really want to improve as I hate missing out on chats in any language!
    I thought I didn’t have an ‘ear’ for language learning and now I realise it would be nice but its not absolutely necessary!

    Reply
    • cherhale says

      November 1, 2013 at 9:05 am

      That’s such a beautiful purpose, and I’m so happy to be a part of helping you get there! The ‘ear’ will surely come, and it’s absolutely not necessary for right now. Glad to have you here!

      Reply
  4. Carol says

    November 3, 2013 at 9:33 am

    L’italiano e’ la madrelingua dei nonni, ma sfortunantemente, dopo sono arrivati negli stati uniti, hanno voluto parlate l’inglese! Quando visito l’italia, vorrei parlare con la gente e non sembra soltante una turista. L’lingua italiana e’ bella e musicale. Adesso, sto diventando una vecchia e, per me, lo studio mi fa un po’ giovane!

    Reply
    • cherhale says

      November 4, 2013 at 9:11 am

      Dei suoi nonni? (Always remember to put the possessive before plural family members. :]) Mi fa molto piacere che lei abbia passione per la lingua!

      Reply
      • Carol says

        November 4, 2013 at 10:05 am

        Si, Cher. Dei miei nonni! Ho dimenticato.Grazie.

        Reply
    • Bob Weisenberg says

      November 25, 2013 at 11:58 am

      Anche io–“Quando visito l’italia, vorrei parlare con la gente e non sembra soltante una turista. L’lingua italiana e’ bella e musicale. Adesso, sto diventando una vecchia e, per me, lo studio mi fa un po’ giovane!”

      Reply
  5. bonniemelielo says

    November 4, 2013 at 9:54 pm

    Studiavo la lingua italiana per 10 anni. Mio marito e io andiamo in Italia ogni anno. Parlare la lingua sara` aperto le porte. Italiana e` la lingua della nostre famiglie e vorrei la parlare bene.

    Reply
    • cherhale says

      November 7, 2013 at 12:51 pm

      Che bello! Qual è il tuo posto preferito in Italia?

      Reply
  6. Sora Takenouchi says

    December 3, 2013 at 10:41 pm

    Why am I learning Italian? Because I love it! Indees I love Italy itself, its culture, its cities, its food, its people, everything. I’m from Mexico and one of my dreams are to visit Italy someday, so, if I want to achieve that I need a lot of things. Learning Italian is one of them and I guess that, if I learn italian, I’ll be closer to my principal goal: visit Italy.
    Thank you so much for helping us with this!
    Greetings from México!

    Reply
    • cherhale says

      December 9, 2013 at 7:05 pm

      That’s gorgeous! Where are you from in Mexico? Also, what level are you at in Italian?

      Reply
  7. Terry Savoca Beckett says

    March 14, 2014 at 1:00 pm

    I am learning Italian because I recently connected with my family in Sicily – my grandfather immigrated in the early 1900’s – and they are the most wonderful people in the world. I want to communicate better with them, learn about my heritage from them, and just feel a part of something that is so special to me. Not to mention that Italian is the most beautiful language of all.

    Reply
    • cherhale says

      March 14, 2014 at 4:49 pm

      Terry, I am totally on board with why you want to learn Italian.

      You’re incredibly lucky to have Italian roots and be able to connect with them.

      Let me know if you need anything at all!

      Reply
  8. Ron Dore says

    April 5, 2014 at 2:37 pm

    I am studying Italian because I live in Italy! I teach English by day and we speak only English in the home. I would like to do more than just ‘get by’, hence my determination to really get down to it.

    Reply
    • cherhale says

      April 6, 2014 at 11:38 pm

      Ciao Ron. That’s great to hear! What level would you say you’re at and where do you want to be in say…3 months?

      Reply
      • Ron Dore says

        May 4, 2014 at 11:31 pm

        I would say my comprehension is upper intermediate plus, but speaking level is much below that. I’m not quite sure how to bridge the gap. In three months’ time I would like to be speaking more fluently!

        Reply
  9. Lenora Boyle says

    April 10, 2014 at 8:02 am

    I gathered documents for 5 years to finally acquire dual-citizenship with Italy through my bloodline, as both sets of grandparents immigrated from Italy to the US. I believe to truly know my heritage and the culture of Italy I need to speak their language. (My parents were born in the US, and did not speak Italian). I love all things Italian and since I lead a group of women to Italy every year, it’s just very important for me to become fluent. Besides, it’s the most musical delicious language around. I just wish I would have learned when I was young as I find it difficult, but I won’t give up.

    Reply
    • cherhale says

      April 13, 2014 at 6:47 pm

      You have such great motivations for learning Italian Lenora, and I know that these will make the difference for you becoming fluent.

      It really is a delicious language.

      Reply
  10. Kuba says

    April 12, 2014 at 8:47 am

    Okay, I am gonna share my “why’s” with you, too.
    I’ve picked up Korean. I started to study it at the university, then I stopped (it’s complicated, but I still want to learn this langugage). So I thought “Hey, why not learn Korean and get a certificate of TOPIK and then apply for being a volounteer in South Korea in 4 years?”, and that became my motivation. Another thing is that this is the very first Asian language I have ever learnt, so I would like to see what’s the difference between this language and others, how differently people think. More, I love all the writing systems and they use one, incredibly simple and good-looking! What will also make me happier is to gain knowledge about North Korea and I believe it’s easier knowing Korean. And among the reasons, let’s say… less serious… I want to impress people by saying them that I speak KOREAN (not Russian, French or German that, generally, many people expect to hear). Also, there’s one funny reason I can connect with any language – this is reading a book withouth any problems in my target language and observing people reactions – the same with speaking with a native in my country in this language. But above all – I love languages! That’s my motivation.

    Reply
    • cherhale says

      April 13, 2014 at 6:48 pm

      Kuba, thank you so much for sharing your motivations. It seems you’ve been on quite the language learning journey.

      Korean is definitely a fascinating language, and I wish you luck!

      Reply
      • Kuba says

        April 13, 2014 at 11:41 pm

        Yes, but not so long ago! Maybe two years, I guess.

        Oh, yes, it is. Even if you don’t want to learn it, it’s really worth observing the sentence structure as there are so many strange things that you would have never believe that!

        Reply
        • cherhale says

          April 15, 2014 at 2:21 pm

          Hahah. I believe it. Do you watch Korean dramas, too?

          Reply
          • Kuba says

            April 15, 2014 at 10:37 pm

            Honestly, I am not really into such things in Korean culture like k-pop or dramas. Maybe I will watch them later, but now they’re too hard to understand. Unless I find some children cartoons, haha, that’d be cool!

  11. Bob Weisenberg says

    May 23, 2014 at 8:31 pm

    Great beginning Cher. I’m going through all 200 of your articles from start to finish just so I make sure I don’t miss anything.

    Reply
  12. Bob Weisenberg says

    May 23, 2014 at 8:34 pm

    Oh, and to answer your question, I’m I’m studying Italian because my wife Jane and I are moving to Italy for at least 6 months starting Sept 1st. Now of course this is kind of a chicken and the egg thing. I’m learning Italian because I’m going to Italy, but I’m going to Italy because, among other things, I love Italian.

    Reply
    • cherhale says

      May 27, 2014 at 5:38 pm

      I’m so excited about your move + I can’t wait to see how much your Italian soars.

      Reply
  13. Lenora Boyle says

    May 25, 2014 at 3:24 pm

    Congrats @Bob on your upcoming move to Italy. Where are you moving to?

    Reply
  14. Joanie Schultz says

    May 26, 2014 at 8:35 am

    Voglio parlare con la famiglia di mio marito in Italia!

    Reply
    • Kerri M says

      May 26, 2014 at 1:46 pm

      Anche io, Joanie! Mio marito é italiano. Lei é americana?

      Reply
      • Joanie Schultz says

        May 27, 2014 at 9:04 pm

        sì, io sono americana! E voi?

        Reply
  15. jessie says

    June 23, 2014 at 8:37 am

    Ok..next! me 🙂 I’m learning Italian because I love the sound of the language, I love the people, the country..and I want to hold spontaneous converstaions when I’m able to return to Italy with my husband for hoidays. I’m here in Florence now studying for 3 months at a school ..so far one month, just under 2 to go..and loving it. It’s hard! molti molti verbi!! aaaghhh!! but..piano,piano 🙂 At the end of three months I’d like to think i’ll be reasonably fluent..at least enough to hold converstaions that don’t require me to stop every now and then, fishing for the correct word or verb tense!! It’ been a huge thing to come all the way from New Zeland, alone, to a coungry where I know no-one..but it’s wonderful to make new friends from all over the world. I highty recommend it to anyone contemplating larning a new language..get as immersed in it as you can..my biggest obstacle would be not having people to talk with at the end of a day..or meeting up with other english speaking ‘people and reverting to english by default. But anyway..meanwhile I enjoy visiting all around the region in my spare time and speaking as much italian in shops and on trains and buses as I can! I LOVE IT!! LA DOLCE VITA, CERTAMENTE!!

    Reply
    • cherhale says

      June 25, 2014 at 7:40 am

      Ciao again Jessie!

      I already know you’re going to make a ton of progress, and I can’t wait to see what happens at the end of your trip. Make sure to update me!

      Reply
  16. Vicki Corleone says

    July 9, 2014 at 10:45 am

    I’m learning Italian because I love this language, and almost everthing italian. Also, I love learning new things. Imparo la lingua italiana perché me la piace molto!

    Reply
    • cherhale says

      August 26, 2014 at 1:58 pm

      Benvenuta, Vicki! It’s better to just say “Mi piace molto.” :]

      Reply
  17. Brendan Watson says

    July 11, 2014 at 12:45 am

    Io sono Irlandese, totalmente Irlandese, ma, non so perche, quando sono in Italia mi sento veramente a casa. Voglio parlare migliore la lingua.

    Reply
    • cherhale says

      August 26, 2014 at 2:01 pm

      Benvenuto Brendan! It’s better to say” Vorrei migliorare il mio italiano.” :]

      Reply
  18. Susannah Walz says

    August 22, 2014 at 8:36 am

    My first post. Firstly, I want to learn Italian because I love to cook and love to eat Italian food. Secondly, I want the challenge of learning something way outside of my comfort zone of computers and numbers. I hope to get up the nerve to actually speak at some point. Baby steps.

    Reply
    • cherhale says

      August 26, 2014 at 1:59 pm

      We definitely have cooking + eating in common, Susannah. You’ll definitely get there. :]

      Reply
  19. Diane Stewart says

    August 24, 2014 at 3:23 am

    I want to learn Italian because I have made some wonderful friends who are more like family and I am making my first trip to Rome(2 weeks of full immersion) in Oct to see the work that they do. They live in the US and Italy. I love the language now. I have been studying for months but still feel I cannot have a conversation. I love your site and the info you provide as well.

    Reply
    • cherhale says

      August 26, 2014 at 1:59 pm

      That sounds like such an amazing time! You might want to try getting a tutor and a language partner and diving into conversation to hone that skill.

      Reply
  20. Sue says

    August 26, 2014 at 12:12 am

    I fell in love with Italy many years ago and made a vow that I would come back and make my life here. I gave up my career, for the best job in the world that of being a mum. Now I live in Italy, my children go to school here and despite no Italian connection we go out and take on this beautiful language, life, culture with gusto. I love learning Italian it connects me physically, emotionally, mentally with life here.
    It’s a bumpy road at times this Italian journey but it is so so worth the adventure.

    Reply
    • cherhale says

      August 26, 2014 at 1:59 pm

      That’s such an amazing story. Do you keep a blog, too?

      Reply
      • Sue says

        August 26, 2014 at 9:43 pm

        In my lists of today, this week, this month, this year starting a blog is in the this year category. I”m just about to embark on a new leg of my Italian journey. Time is limited right now but exciting times ahead. I’ll keep you posted.

        Reply
        • Cher says

          September 10, 2014 at 1:48 pm

          Can’t wait to hear all about it!

          Reply
  21. Joey says

    September 19, 2014 at 12:17 am

    I know some basic Italian, my father lived there as a child, and my grandparents used to speak to me in Italian. Sadly, I never quite picked up the language from my family. I keep in touch with relatives in Italy, so I’d really like to improve my Italian. Even the little that I do know, is only really used in Puglia lol.
    I also do duolingo for practice – and it’s good practice! But they don’t explain anything, which is where your site fits in nicely!!!!

    Reply
    • cherhale says

      September 19, 2014 at 6:35 pm

      Your story is definitely one that I hear often as so many people are learning Italian to connect to their roots. Glad to know that the site is helpful for filing in some gaps. :]

      Reply
  22. cherhale says

    September 19, 2014 at 6:36 pm

    That is going to be so exciting! I would LOVE to do that.

    Reply
  23. Rose M. says

    September 20, 2014 at 11:54 pm

    My grandparents were born in Italy. My father’s parents learned English and it became their primary language. My mother’s parents learned a little of English, and Italian remained their primary language. My mother spoke Italian and English, however my sisters and I never learned Italian from her. I still have family in Italy (cousins,etc), and would love to be able to converse with them when I visit them in 1-2 years. My youngest sister has visited them, and had a some difficulty communicating with them as they did not know much English. I communicate with one of my cousins, who lives in Campobasso Italy, on Facebook. We communicate in our native languages using some type of app to translate, or we try to communicate in the other’s language, also using an app. It’s difficult! I love hearing the Italian language, as well as the culture, food, etc. Thank you for being here to help us all!

    Reply
    • cherhale says

      September 25, 2014 at 1:33 pm

      Ciao Rose!

      What a gorgeous reason to learn Italian. Having family is a really strong motivator, and I can’t wait to hear about your progress. :]

      Reply
  24. indianajess says

    November 10, 2014 at 11:45 am

    I want to learn Italian so I can regain my independence! I’ve always been a proud, outspoken loner & have always been able to handle my affairs on my own. Now that I live in Italy with my Italian husband, he often has to do the talking on my behalf. It’s frustrating! So every time I am able to communicate successfully on my own, the sense of pride I feel reminds me that I must stay on my path and become a disciplined learner so that someday soon, I will be independent and fully capable of managing on my own again.

    Reply
    • cherhale says

      November 10, 2014 at 3:36 pm

      I can definitely understand why you’d want to learn Italian then! With that kind of motivation, I have full confidence that you’ll be fluent soon.

      Reply
  25. Lily says

    January 15, 2015 at 11:39 am

    I’m 17 in high school in Australia, and I have been studying Italian since year 7. Language was compulsory in the first two years, but after that it became an elective subject, and I chose to continue to study Italian because I was somewhat captivated by the beauty of it. I remember sitting there and watching my two teachers converse with each other and I’m just like “wow, I can’t wait until I can understand this”.
    However, I feel as if my school – maybe just Australian schools in general – doesn’t take foreign languages seriously. It has been very difficult to learn and be able to speak and comprehend. I feel as if they teach us enough to pass the tests and that’s it. I will admit that my motivation to learn has wavered over the years, but still I’ve stuck with it – and within the last few months I decided to stick the damn school and learn the language myself!
    Right now, as I write this, I am in Italy on exchange (Verona), and I can barely explain the weather. It’s extremely frustrating and somewhat embarrassing, considering I sit in a class every day watching the ways they teach English and German and French and so many other languages, and how fluent the students are because of it.. It just makes me hate my school’s lack of teaching methods even more. .
    I also have another reason. My grandfather is German, but he never taught my mother, who then could never have been able to pass it down to me. It’s quite upsetting that a piece of family history was never given to my mother and me. I believe children who grow up with multiple languages are very lucky and advantaged in the world. Alas, I have fallen in love with everything Italian, and I dream of teaching my future son or daughter this beautiful language, regardless of whether we live here and their father is Italian or not.

    Reply
    • Cher says

      January 17, 2015 at 9:44 pm

      Your story is incredibly inspiring, Lily. Despite your dissatisfaction, you still stuck with it and even made a move to learn it on your own. Taking the step to study in Verona is huge, and I know that you’ll learn to make peace with your frustration and make progress. Buona fortuna!

      Reply
      • Lily says

        January 23, 2015 at 12:01 am

        I still have an awful long way to go, but I’m ready. Grazie mille!

        Reply
  26. Jim Millar says

    January 18, 2015 at 11:35 am

    My grandfather was born in Italy, and came to the US in 1908. I have always felt strongly connected to the Italian culture and language. Three years ago, I spent 4 weeks in Siena and I became hopelessly hooked. I have been back every summer since then. This year, I’m trying to start up my own program for singers and instrumentalists in the lovely town of Sarteano. I have a lot of motivation to become more fluent in Italian, since it’s absolutely necessary for me to continue to teach and work there in the summers. Eventually, I want to become an Italian citizen “jure sanguine.” Thank you for your inspiration!

    Reply
    • Cher says

      January 21, 2015 at 1:17 am

      Siena is a wonderful place to fall in love with Italy. It’s so awesome that you’re starting up your own program in Sarteano, and I know that with your motivation, you’ll definitely become a fluent Italian citizen. :]

      Reply
  27. Danila says

    February 19, 2015 at 2:23 pm

    I wan’t to relearn Italian so I have the ability to be able to speak in my native language. I was born in Italy and moved to Australia when I was 2 years old. My parents did not speak Italian to me at home and I quickly lost my grasp on the language. I would love more then anything to be able to speak to my Nonna and Zia who still live in Italy and I would love to be able to suprise mum one day by having a conversation with her in Italian!

    Reply
  28. John Tezza says

    May 15, 2015 at 7:13 am

    My great-grandfather immigrated to America in 1896, from Longarone in the Belluno region. I have three older sisters, but I was the only one who was really fascinated with out family’s history. In college, in 1983, I took a year of Italian, and was planning to study abroad for a year in Italy, but then life got in the way.

    Since then, I have made several attempts to get back into my study of Italian, even ante Internet, but never really got any traction because of the lack of practice partners. A year ago, after searching for an affordable method of learning italian and researching online products, I enrolled with Babbel to once again make a true effort. I have really enjoyed that program, and it has helped immensely, but I still didn’t have any practice partners. I live in South Carolina, and there just aren’t a lot of italian speaking people in this area.

    I found your podcasts on my iPhone and immediately started listening. I was very taken with your non-intimidating yet advanced approach, and have been filling my brain I with the oldest podcasts that I could get on my phone (starting with the Jan 2014 episodes).

    It makes me feel good to hear you say not to worry about listening to “all Italian” broadcasts, as, even though I may not understand a whole lot of what is being said, I will benefit from hearing how the language is structured and I can start picking words and phrases that I recognize out of the conversation.

    I am planning a trip to Italy next year with my fiancé, and I am also encouraging her to learn some…and she is willing!

    Thank you for your effort and passion…. I aspire to do the same with my learning of Italian!

    Reply

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